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Relationship
Issues
Some
Common Signs
Relationship issues cause me to
sometime feel as though my life
revolves around my relationships.
I seem to be
always looking for the perfect healthy relationship or getting over an
unhealthy relationship.
My mind
buzzes with relationship issues – when will he call? What is he
thinking? What did I do wrong?
While relationship are
generally defined in terms of giving, our primary motives are quite
often,
no matter how we may deny it, about what we receive.
The word ‘issue’ when dealing with relationships are defined as something that is
in dispute. Things
like:
We yearn to
receive love, respect, gifts, great sex, commitment, fun times, love,
safety, confidence, honor, equality, etc.
These factors often
become issues; things we complain we are not receiving or not
receiving enough of.
Have you heard (or said) any of the following?
- You never tell me you love
me.
- You put me down in public.
- You don’t do your share of the
household chores.
- You raise your voice when we argue.
- You’ve put on
weight since we married (watch it guys!!)
One of the most
important aspects in any relationship,
is that the bedrock of
love and of healthy relationships
sustains you, nurtures you and helps you to grow as an INDIVIDUAL.
People
often talk about ‘real’, meaningful love being love that is
unconditional, which is interesting considered in the light of what was
said above.
Unconditional love doesn’t focus on giving or receiving. It
is focusing on individual growth. It is not measurable in terms of how
much or what is given or received but in whether the outcome was
individual growth.
Paradoxically, unconditional love has one condition:
that the individual is sustained and nurtured and therefore grows.
Where
individuals are allowed, and positively encouraged, to grow, the
relationship will blossom and develop. Relationship problems will be
solved more easily; often their negative weight will simply be diluted.
I’ll give you an example. Ignorance is the cause of
many ills. Ignorance leads to misunderstands, miscommunication, the
inability to make informed decisions, lack of rational thought, etc.
Growth implies learning, awareness and knowledge. It leads to
understanding, improved interpersonal communication, empathy and
self-control.
Most importantly, it puts relationship issues into
perspective.
For additional relationship
management
advice, such as the relationship
issues section here, please check out the
topics on:
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