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Abusive
Relationships
Know
When it is Enough
Abusive relationships are
destructive relationships.
Hundreds of thousands of
women and men are abused by a current or former spouse, boyfriend or
girlfriend each year.
In
fact, the National Domestic Violence Hotline answers more than 16,000
calls every month from victims, survivors, friends, family
members, law enforcement personnel, domestic violence advocates and the
general public.
If you or someone you know
experiences any of the following signs of an abusive relationship, seek
help immediately.
In addition to
the obvious physical abuse, there are many forms of a destructive
relationship.
Here
are some actions that can be a form of abuse:
- You frequently feel humiliated, insulted or
degraded by your partner. This may be accompanied by your
partner dismissing these feelings or says that the abuse
is your fault.
- Your partner destroys your
personal belongings.
- Your partner touches you
in ways that scare or hurt you.
- Your partner
forbids you to seek medical treatment.
- You feel
dominated and/or controlled — meaning he or she controls where you go,
what you do and whom you see or talk to.
- You
frequently receive the "silent treatment," and feel like your partner
purposefully keeps you at a distance emotionally.
- You feel threatened — or are threatened — with
violence.
- You're isolated, or made to feel isolated, from
your friends and
family.
- You are not allowed to have control of
your own money.
- You are forced to have sex or
you're forced into sexual activities you're uncomfortable with or that
hurt you.
What should you do if you find yourself
in an abusive relationship?
If you think you love
someone but often feel afraid, it's time to get out of the relationship
— fast. You're worth being treated with respect and you can get help.
First,
make sure you're safe. A trusted adult can help. If the person has
physically attacked you, don't wait to get medical attention or to call
the police.
Avoid the tendency to isolate
yourself from your friends and family. You might feel like you have
nowhere to turn, or you might be embarrassed about what's been going
on, but this is when you need support most.
People
like counselors, doctors, teachers, coaches, and friends will want to
help you, so let them.
Friends and family who love
and care about you can help you break away. It's important to know that
asking for help isn't a sign of weakness. It actually shows that you
have a lot of courage and are willing to stand up for yourself.
In addition to the abusive
relationships section here, you can find other Love Hurts topics (and how
to deal with them) in the cheating
relationship, breakups,
broken heart,
bad
relationship and online
dating safety sections.
And if you are still
looking
for
that perfect someone, we have some great advice
that is sure to help you out, such as:
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